Wednesday, April 11, 2007

OB Funnies

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Nope, Still Don't Like Sushi

But here we are back at Sushi Rock last night!

Here's one of Eli cause she's a goof and its a cute picture!

Hope everyone is having a nice Easter. My mom and Wylie were supposed to come visit yesterday and stay today and have brunch, but the weather was not cooperating.

Monday, April 02, 2007

My Friend Tracy Sent This To Me

1. Did you hear about the nurse who died and went straight to hell? It took her two weeks to realize she wasn't at work!

2. You know you're a nurse if ... you would like to meet the inventor of the call light some night in a dark alley.

3. Your sense of humor gets more warped each year. Almost everything can seem humorous...eventually.

4. You know the smell of different diarrheas and can identify them.

5. You can tell the pharmacist more about the medication they are dispensing than they know.

6. You check the caller ID on your day off to see if anyone from the hospital is trying to call and ask you to work.

7. You've been telling stories in a restaurant and made someone at another table throw up.

8. You notice that you are using more 4 letter words than you did before you started nursing.

9. Every time someone asks you for a pen, you can find at least 4 of them on you. (in your hair or behind your ear!)

10. You live by the motto "to be right is only half the battle, to convince the doctor is the more difficult part."

11. You've told a confused patient that your name was that of your coworker and to holler if they need help.

12. Your bladder can expand to the size of a Winnebago's water tank.

13. You find yourself checking out other customer's veins in grocery waiting lines.

14. You avoid unhealthy looking shoppers in the mall for fear that they will drop near you and you'll have to do CPR on your day off.

15. Your fingers have gone places you never thought possible.

16. You have seen more penises than any prostitute.

17. You can go from cleaning up poop, straight to lunch and not think twice about it.

Worst. Day. Ever.

Yesterday was the first day on the floor for OB. It was the worst day ever. It was a nightmare. My instructor is actually really nice, and helpful, but a total stickler for rules and such. If we're late, we get written up, if we don't' know what we're doing, we get written up, etc. I've never even thought about being written up!

Anyways, so we get to the floor around noon (after 5 hours of classroom time) and we have to change into their lovely, stained, ripped scrubs-none of which fit anyone. Then we get on the floor and as soon as we walk in, there's an emergency. So all the nurses are running around like crazy and start yelling orders at us (none of which we can do, and half of which we didn't even understand). So my instructor grabs me to give a baby a hep shot cause its leaving in 5 minutes. I've never given a shot to an adult, let alone a baby. But that went fine, I was just a little shaky.

The nurses were in a bad mood all day and were extremely pissy with us. It was not fun. Plus, my instructor thought that we had SOME clue as to what we were supposed to be doing...WRONG. We had no instruction before we got to the floor at all! Even the charting was a project. She kept telling me to chart this and that and make a nurses note about this...I finally caught on that she thought I knew what she was talking about and stopped her and said "ok, you DO understand that I've never charted ANYTHING before, right? Seriously, like this is the first time writing on a chart, so you're gonna have to slow down and tell me where you want me to write this and how to word it because we never had a class on that!".

In the end the teacher had a bitch session (not about us, thank god), then we had a bitch session, then we left for the day and the cool people in the group went to Don Pablos and had margaritas and some dinner. We felt much better after some drinks. I think that will become our Sunday ritual.

I hate OB...I do not want to be an OB nurse...please please please send me back to Psych!
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